carnelian

[dramatispersonae]

You find yourself in a beautiful red room, the edges of each wall adorned with real gold accents. At the center of the room is a long table, several chairs on either side of it, perfect for very serious conferences. In the middle of the table is a plate of strawberry jam tarts atop it, one per teammate present.

In the corner of the room is a hole in the ground, only large enough for a small animal to fit through. Next to it is a flat iron bar, curled at its tip, where a golden bell has been hung from it.

Finally, on one wall is a large poster which reads (or you find read aloud to you, if you cannot read):

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the King's horses and all the King's men
Couldn't put Humpty together again

Comments

inquiries

[dramatispersonae]

[ring bell receive rabbit]

Re: inquiries

[fighting_alena]

[rings bell!]

What does it mean where it says: "being a knight of the king also, he was obligated to follow the law and decided to avoid the wall."? What law was keeping him away from the wall?

Re: inquiries

[dramatispersonae]

[there is a few moments of nothing, then a little red rabbit, regally dressed, scurries out of the hole and holds out a piece of paper to you. in stubby little handwriting, it reads:

Why, it is simple. He was a bodyguard, but also a knight of the king. He had twice the obligations. And the law was one made by the King, of course. It prevented anyone from sitting on the wall at precisely two o'clock, for grievous business took place on the other side at that exact time.

the rabbit looks at you expectantly.]

[crusthatecean]

[Ringing obnoxiously]

What was Humpty Dumpty doing up on the wall, and what caused him to fall off? Did the law keeping the bodyguard away apply to him also?

What was the punishment for going near the wall. What exactly did the king order the bodyguard to do?

[dramatispersonae]

[the little rabbit darts off and returns, same as before. he returns with another paper:

He was sitting, according to testimony. The law applies equally to all.

The punishment is execution. And are bodyguards not employed to guard and defend? Humpty Dumpty was a close friend of the King, after all.

the rabbit looks at you expectantly.]

Re: inquiries

[thankyouverymooch]

[ ringing the bell ]

Out of curiousity, did Humpty Dumpty have any particular reason to break the law and sit on the wall?

Re: inquiries

[dramatispersonae]

[the little rabbit darts off and returns, same as before. he returns with another paper:

None that is known. He was good friends with the King, but perhaps he thought himself above the law for that very reason.

the rabbit looks at you expectantly.]

first case

[dramatispersonae]

On the table you find a paper, though it most certainly wasn't there before. It reads, or is read to you:

DEFENDANT: the King's men
DETAILS: When the crime transpired, it was two o'clock, or no-sitting time. Humpty Dumpty's bodyguard should have prevented the fall, but being a knight of the king also, he was obligated to follow the law and decided to avoid the wall. However, his negligence nearly resulted in Humpty Dumpty's death, and he has therefore also failed his duty as Humpty Dumpty's bodyguard, as well as the King's orders.
PROPOSED SENTENCE: Execution

Re: first case

[thankyouverymooch]

Are we supposed to put up a defense for this guy?

[crusthatecean]

Obviously? I mean, come on, this is bullshit.

Re: first case

[antreegonist]

We pick what the crime was, what the punishment should be, and why...? Jeez.

Re: first case

[fighting_alena]

Wait, this doesn't make sense...

Re: first case

[thankyouverymooch]

Not much, no.

verdict

[dramatispersonae]

[a gold-trimmed envelope, letter-writing paper, and a red ink pen on the table has been provided for you. the back of the envelope reads FIRST VERDICT.

you understand the letter must be sealed and left on the table when you finish writing your answer, but you can always open it again later. the resealing would just be noticeable.]

Re: verdict

[thankyouverymooch]

[ writing ]

We've decided three people should be punished for this crime.

The knight who failed to protect humpty dumpty should lose his job and position, along with any privileges he might have had for leaving the order under normal circumstances.

Humpty Dumpty, who broke the no-sitting law, should also be punished and be forced to pay a fine fitting of his crime.

And the King, who would have unfairly sentenced the knight to death but gave no punishment to his own friend, who also broke the law, should be forced to step down from the throne. The people of the kingdom should be the ones to choose who will replace him.

second case

[dramatispersonae]

On the table you find another paper, though it most certainly wasn't there before. It reads, or is read to you:

DEFENDANT: Humpty Dumpty
DETAILS: At precisely two o'clock, Humpty Dumpty was reportedly seen to be sitting on a high wall, despite it being no-sitting time. Furthermore, by his contract with the King, he was obligated more than anyone else to follow the King's orders. This particular offense was grievous, for the wall on which Humpty Dumpty sat was the wall surrounding the grave of the King's dear friend, whom the King mourned daily at every two o'clock. His fall nearly caused a second death to occur on those grounds, and caused the King much emotional damage.
PROPOSED SENTENCE: Execution

Re: second case

[thankyouverymooch]

... this is a waste of time.

We already decided how to sentence him earlier.

Re: second case

[fighting_alena]

So, Lynx.

Ready to put that mean ol' King back on his throne?

[crusthatecean]

Except now we know it was an enormous waste of time to assume the king wasn't going to punish Humpty Dumpty. On the other hand, he's still an enormous douche if he executes people for interrupting his mourning time.

Personally I'd say our previous verdict stands, but then again, I'm sure you'd rather argue over it endlessly with the girl than involve knights, so I'll leave you to it.

[crusthatecean]

[Holding his breath]

[antreegonist]

*if you pass out i suppose i will catch you*

Re: second case

[fighting_alena]

[AAAARGH!]

Re: second case

[antreegonist]

...predictable...

Everyone involved in this case is still morons.

verdict

[dramatispersonae]

[a gold-trimmed envelope, letter-writing paper, and a red ink pen on the table has been provided for you. the back of the envelope reads SECOND VERDICT.

you understand the letter must be sealed and left on the table when you finish writing your answer.]

Re: verdict

[thankyouverymooch]

[ writing AGAIN ]

We've decided three people should be punished for this crime.

The knight who failed to protect humpty dumpty should lose his job and position, along with any privileges he might have had for leaving the order under normal circumstances.

Humpty Dumpty, who broke the no-sitting law, should also be punished and be forced to pay a fine fitting of his crime.

And the King, who would have unfairly sentenced the knight to death but gave no punishment to his own friend, who also broke the law, should be forced to step down from the throne. The people of the kingdom should be the ones to choose who will replace him.