You are in a small closed room. There is a large TV here. Nothing else is here, and there is no door. As you observe these facts, the TV turns on, revealing... well, it's a grainy image of Bones on Kunzite, if Bones's face tended to be screwed up in an obscene leer and if he had bright, bright yellow eyes. He speaks in an effeminate lisp:
"Well helloooooo there, ladles and jellyspoons -- and I hope your spoons have lots of jelly, if you take my meaning." And here, in case you could possibly have missed his meaning, he licks his lips lasciviously. "I'm Kanji Tatsumi, reporter under the covers -- you all might recognize me as 'Bones', and believe me, darlings, there's a name I'm, mmmm, totally behind. On my previous hot investigations I snuck into a steamy, all-male bathhouse in cognito delicto. Today, I feel my efforts may be better received if I go in even deeper, maybe take it all the way, and visit the best hot spots of the city that bathhouse could be found in. Is THIS the fabulous city of sin everyone's talking about? Oooh, fan me, I'm sweating! I can't wait to get to the action! But I'd better be careful -- the city's a dangerous place and who knows what sort of, mmhmhm, tight spots I might find myself in? Oooh, but I won't let it stop me from plumbing its depths! Why don't you come with me? Here I goooo~"
He turns and runs; as he recedes into the distance static fills the screen, then the surface of the TV changes -- it's gone black, but it's rippling fluidly, like the surface has turned to water.
Please pick a course of action.
((OOC: #kanji is my chan btw!))